Why You Should Have A List Before You Even Meet Someone

Hello Lovelies!

I’ll be getting personal with this post, but I am excited to open up even more with y’all on an important topic: dating! I have shared a few things about my dating life, but overall I would like to think I am an open book and will always be real and raw with you. You will see more content regarding my relationship and I am so excited that Con is interested in sharing in that content! I also intend to share with you the insight I have found in my own dating journey over the years: the good, the bad, whatever can encourage you or speak to your life. Let’s get into today’s thoughts: the list!

The List

What is this list? I feel like a lot of women (anyone really) already have one, but it is an actual list, written down, of a person’s desires in their future spouse. This list could include physical attributes, dating styles, core beliefs and values, and just other do’s and don’t’s. This seems simple but (trust me) it is not. I made my first list while sitting down to coffee with my best friend the summer after high school. I was hopeful at the idea of moving across the country and potentially finding the love of my life, and I just wanted to dream a little about who that person could be. Here is that list (not kidding here it is):

So it has been a couple years since I pulled this out (btw it says LAR bc those are my initials). There are a few inapplicable comments, and some things I could add. But a whole lot of this list remains true. The person I want to marry is someone I would not want to hide from my parents, someone who pursues me, respects my body, the way I look, and my boundaries, someone who is honest, and someone who shares my faith. I did not realize at the time how important this list would be to me, but when I went through my dating hardships, I remembered what I deserve, what I am worth, and what I really want out of a partnership.

Why Is This Important

Manifestation? Sure! By writing down what you want for your future, you can better focus your energy towards those goals – and this does not apply to relationships alone, but you can also manifest your career goals as well! When you write down that you want old fashioned pursuit it becomes easier to ignore trolls who offer you less than you deserve!

Standards? Ya! There is nothing wrong with having high standards for yourself or the people around you. Similarly to manifestation, you are setting yourself up to avoid whatever does not fit what you want. People say it can be harder to date this way, but I say it is worth it!

Dating With Intention

Here is the big kicker! Y’all have heard me discuss dating with intention before, and this is where it starts! Maybe you are praying for your future spouse, or maybe you’re just a badass boss babe and you want to only date seriously if they are the one. Whenever I explain my philosophy of dating with intention to anyone they get super confused at first but hear me out – I would rather not date at all than go out with a bunch of people who are no good for me. In that time I spend not dating, I am learning about myself and growing into the person I want to be. And when I find someone who I truly like, I only choose to date them because the intentions of the relationship are serious on both sides.

I hope this post served to encourage you in your life to grow into the person you want to be, beginning with self-love and intentionality!



How To Not Be A Clueless Idiot When Dating From Said Clueless Idiot

Hello Lovelies!

It’s been a while since I have shared a lighthearted, creative post on this page and as I tease this dating content I figure there is no better time to start releasing it! I have wanted to share various dating horror stories but I have remained hesitant to do so as those stories do not involve only me and I try to respect others privacy. With that being said, here are my recent experiences, to show you what not to do. You are welcome!

Dating Apps

By this point I have no idea how many dating apps are out there but there are certainly some top contenders and at least there is something for everyone! No matter what app you prefer, here are some helpful tips!

Instead of calling yourself an “Instagram Model” or “Lifestyle Blogger,” make that job title more convincing with words like creative, entrepreneur, or self-employed.

Do not swipe right on people you do not like. And do not stay matched with them after they send 10+ intro messages.

Do not forget to mention some of your top deal breakers in your bio. This way you do not end up talking to a criminal (or a fan of illegal activity) for weeks or months or years.

DO let people know what you are looking for, even if you do not know. Someone who explicitly asks for apples is much less likely to receive oranges.


I have a personal vendetta against this app and have honestly deleted it after many failed attempts to flirt with other humans. I am not saying to never use this app, but maybe do not give out your username if you do not want creepy messages from strangers.

Do not bombard your crush with literally every detail of your day in picture form.

But do not be afraid to message first.

If you do not like someone, stop sending photos of your face and switch to photos of the ceiling… maybe they’ll get the hint but also maybe not.

Do not use this app to say “I love you,” whether you have met the person or not.

Do not creep on someones location or snap score for literally any reason especially in the context of dating.

And never answer a “u up” text with an actual detailed description of what you are doing or how you are feeling at that hour.

First Dates

Ok Imma just dive into these tips:

DO NOT follow a stranger into the woods just because they say it is cooler than getting coffee. Coffee is great, the atmosphere is wonderful and all those people in that public place are your friends.

At least check if they have a mugshot before going to the woods or a mall or his parents house.

Do not say you are available all afternoon and then disappear 15 minutes in.

Here’s an icebreaker that has worked only one time: pretend you’re afraid of something and see if they hug you.

If the date is bad, do not act like it is not.

Meeting People Not On An App (aka IRL)

Do not stalk their Instagram and later pretend you have never seen it when it comes up in conversation.

Do hold extended eye contact with them as you make them more and more uncomfortable to be around you. This will make you memorable.

DO NOT pretend to be on the phone with someone just to get out of a potentially bland/awkward conversation with your crush. Not a good idea.

Do enlist a friends help when deep stalking – ask them to view the person’s story or investigate their age – this way you are much less creepy for not doing it yourself.

Ok I think that’s enough for now! I hope you all enjoy this very random post and you remember that it is designed to be funny and not to be taken seriously!